It's An Alien, Not A Monster
by austria13
Summary: Dean and Sam are hunting a new creature that they've never seen before. Can the strange man who shows up explain it to them? AU, Superwho, Random. T for language because I'm paranoid
1. Doctor Who?

Hello dumplings!

This kind of randomly popped into my head one night, and I was bored so I figured I might as well write it.

AU. Supernatural/Doctor Who. Some language.

Enjoy!

* * *

"Dean, I have no clue," Sam sighed at his older brother. "The lore doesn't match anything I've ever seen."

"Then look harder, Sam," Dean growled in response. "I really can't believe we're dealing with _another_ newbie."

Sam rolled his eyes and opened his computer back up. They'd been hunting this creature for the past couple of weeks, and it was the weirdest case they'd ever worked. Sometimes, when it ran into people, it killed them—gruesomely. Sometimes, it ran away. The sheriff had found weird tunnels all around the forest surrounding his small town of East Joneston, South Dakota. They were always the same size, and they always burrowed straight down. But the weirdest part of the whole story was that absolutely _no_ _one_ who saw the monster saw the same thing. Undoubtedly, it was the same monster, because of the identical tunnels, but not one single person had seen the same monster. One had seen a zombie, one had seen a Wendigo, one had seen a werewolf, one had seen a massive, demonic-looking hawk—the list went on and on.

The next day, the two brothers decided to explore the woods and see if they could find the monster. They packed everything they had—salt rounds in sawed-offs, .45s loaded with silver and wrought-iron bullets, holy water—they had no clue what they were dealing with and wanted to be prepared.

They struck gold just about half an hour into their exploration, heading east out of town. Dean was in front, scouting the ground, with Sam to his rear, scanning the treetops, when Dean noticed one of the tunnels the sheriff had told them about. Squatting down for a better view, Dean noticed something wet-looking around the edge of the hole. He dipped his finger in it and sniffed. "Blood," he pronounced, distaste coloring his features.

"Of course," Sam groaned.

"Let's keep moving, see if we can track this thing," Dean said as he pushed off his knees to stand all the way up.

After a few minutes of scanning the ground, the duo had found tracks that changed with every single step the monster took. The only reason they knew it was the same creature was because they were going in the same direction and every single one was a different animal. It was too much of a coincidence to _be_ a coincidence, so the boys trudged onward.

* * *

Hours later, Sam and Dean were still following the creature's tracks. Suddenly, they noticed movement in the bushes ahead of them. "Sam, do you see that?" Dean demanded, suddenly alert.

"Yeah, I saw it too!" Sam exclaimed, salt-filled sawed-off aimed directly at the offending bushes. "I'm ready when you are," he told his older brother.

"Okay," Dean responded. "One…two…_three!_" On three, the brothers ran screaming at the bush. The creature gave a startled squawk and jumped out of the bushes and away.

"Holy shit, Sam, did you see that?!" Dean shouted as they sprinted after the monster.

"Yeah, man," Sam panted, "it looked like a huge bird or something."

"What the hell, man, it was a totally a combination rhino-hippo-cat thing!" Dean gasped to his brother.

Choosing to save their breath for the chase, the men kept sprinting, knowing that if the beast kept heading this direction, soon it would reach a cliff and have nowhere to go. After a couple of minutes, they reached the cliff, and the thing skidded to a stop on the edge of the precipice.

"Hasta la vista, baby," Dean growled as he and Sam aimed their weapons at the thing. Suddenly, they heard a weird whooshing, whirring noise. "The hell," Dean wondered aloud as the two turned around and saw a big blue box begin to materialize behind them. "What the hell is this?" Dean shouted, eyes darting from Sam to the box to the creature, who was now cowering on the edge of the cliff.

Finally the whirring stopped, and a gangly man in a bow tie and jacket stepped out of the box, which Dean and Sam could now see was labeled with the words "POLICE BOX" across the top. "Don't kill it!" the man told them in a British accent, hands outstretched towards the Winchesters' guns.

"It's killed innocent people, sir," Dean insisted as he transferred his attention and aim from the man to the creature.

"It's scared and confused!" the man countered, jumping between Dean's gun and the animal.

"It's a monster!" Dean growled, anger beginning to boil to the surface.

"No, it's not!" the man replied, laying a hand on the thing's head. "It's an alien."

"Bullshit," Dean said, cocking his gun, "no such thing."

"Yes there is," the bow tie-wearing man responded frantically, "you're looking at two right in front of you!"

"Get out of my fucking way!" Dean roared.

"No," the man calmly replied.

"Dean," Sam hastily grabbed his brother's shoulder, "maybe we should listen to him." Sam faltered at the look of angry disbelief his brother shot towards him. "I mean, look at the facts, Dean. We've never seen this kind of creature before, and the man did just materialize in a police box thing right in front of our eyes. I think we're out of our depth on this one. Please, put the gun down, and let's listen to what this guy has to say."

Dean reluctantly lowered his gun. "Fine. You have twenty minutes to explain all this to us, mister."

"More than enough time," the strange man replied happily, content that the duo were no longer intent on killing the creature.

* * *

Ten minutes later, the brothers were sitting on the rocky ground, staring incredulously at the Doctor. "So, it's a what?" Dean demanded.

"It is a psychic cat that escaped from a zoo on a starship passing by Earth. More importantly, it's the last one of its kind," the gangly stranger said in his charming British accent.

"And you're a what, again?" Sam asked, a confused expression on his face.

"I am a Time Lord," the man responded.

"And what's that?" Dean growled, still a little angry at the man for interrupting them.

"A Lord of Time," the man replied, as though Dean were a bit of a dullard.

"What the hell do you do?" Dean practically shouted, not appreciating being treated like an idiot by someone who wasn't Sam, Bobby, or Castiel.

"I travel through time and space in my TARDIS—sorry, my box. I help people. I save people, and things. I solve problems. People call me the Doctor."

"Doctor Who?" Sam asked.

"Just the Doctor," the man responded with a secretive smile.

"All right, then," Sam said, still a bit confused. The brothers looked at each other, still trying to comprehend everything.

"Oh, hold on just one minute!" The Doctor jumped up and ran into the TARDIS. After a few minutes, he returned with a box of—

"Are those_ cat treats?_" Dean asked incredulously.

"How else do you catch a psychic cat?" the Doctor returned. "Excuse me just one minute, gentlemen," he said as he shook the treats to wake up the cat, then slowly backed into the TARDIS. A little while later, he returned, rubbing his hands together. "The cat has been contained!" he announced.

"Wonderful," Dean replied with a sarcastic roll of his eyes. "What the hell makes a psychic cat different from a normal cat, anyway?"

"Honestly, not that much," the Doctor responded, "Except that, when they're scared, they take the shape of whatever frightens their viewer the most. And they'll tunnel to try and create a burrow for themselves. And if those don't work, they'll kill their attacker." He clapped his hands together, saying, "Who's hungry?"

Dean immediately jumped to his feet and shot his hand into the air, forgetting all of his former distrust of the Doctor. "Me. I'm hungry. Like really hungry. Do you have pie? I'm hungry."

Sam rolled his eyes at his brother and got to his feet more slowly. "I wouldn't mind a bite, either."

"Come in then," the Doctor motioned them into the box. Warily, the boys followed, each fully prepared for an attack.

Sam pushed the door open, and the Winchesters stopped dead in their tracks.

"Son of a bitch," Dean breathed.

"Is it—_bigger_ on the _inside?_" Sam asked.

* * *

To be continued! I hope you all enjoyed; please R&R!

Until next time!


	2. Geronimo!

Sorry I'm so horrible at updating, everyone . I hope you still love me!

Here's chapter two! It's mostly fluff, the boys on the TARDIS with the Doctor.

Enjoy 3

* * *

"Dean, why is your hair wet? And why are you only wearing a towel?" Sam asked as his brother walked into the control room of the TARDIS.

"'Cause I was in the pool, duh," Dean responded as he walked across the room to punch the Doctor lightly on the shoulder. "What's up, Doc?" he chuckled to himself. He'd made that joke a hundred times, and he still thought it was funny.

"I thought I asked you not to call me that, Dean," the Doctor responded distractedly as he fiddled with the controls on the TARDIS.

"So?" Dean replied cheekily as he walked off in the direction of his room to grab some clothes.

"Jerk," Sam called after him.

"Bitch," Dean said without so much as a look over his shoulder.

Sam rolled his eyes. Months after meeting the Doctor, they'd seen more new, beautiful, broken worlds than Sam could count, and his brother still hadn't changed. Sam, on the other hand…well. Sam had thought that Earth was messed up, but _man_…some of those other places the Doctor had taken them…wow. Sam's favorite was still Raxacoricofallapatorius, purely because it was hilarious to see Dean trip up over the name every time he tried to say it. A couple times, the brothers had nearly died while the Doctor ran off to "poke something with a stick;" in other words, to stick his nose into other worlds' business. But he always managed to save Sam and Dean and people on whatever troubled world in whatever troubled time, and the Winchesters really admired him for that. In fact, he knew Dean would never admit it, but Dean was totally developing a BFC on the Doctor.

"Sam, hand me that wrench there, would you?" The Doctor's voice jerked Sam out of his memories.

"Yeah, sure, Doc," Sam said as he bent down to hand the wrench to the Doctor, who was under the floor panels of the TARDIS's central console, fixing something again.

"Oh, not you now, too," the Doctor grumbled good-naturedly. "Oh, well, guess it can't be helped," he shrugged and went back to fixing the TARDIS. Sam sat back at the console with a bowl of custard and a plate of fish fingers (it really was quite a delicious combination) to watch the universe pass by outside. "Oh, you sexy, sexy thing!" the Doctor cried as Sam heard a whirring and that strange thumping noise he'd become accustomed to that, for the past few hours, had been missing.

"Got it fixed, Doc?" Dean asked as he came down the stairs into the central control room. "You know this thing almost as well as I know my baby. God, I miss her."

"Don't worry, Dean, Bobby'll be taking good care of her," Sam reassured his brother. "And, you know, the Doctor probably knows the TARDIS better than you know the Impala. He has had over a thousand years to get to know it."

"Her!" Dean and the Doctor both shouted at Sam in unison. They shared a smile—Sam just couldn't understand the deep, underlying relationship between a man and his vehicle. Dean continued, "And, by the way, I disagree. He didn't have to build the TARDIS from the ground up. Twice."

"But I actually met the TARDIS, so I win," the Doctor childishly stuck his tongue out at the Doctor.

"But my Impala is my baby," Dean countered.

"And my TARDIS is sexy," the Doctor said.

"Guys, come on," Sam interrupted. He rolled his eyes—he was always breaking up their childish fights. The Doctor had over a thousand years on him, and Dean had over four, but it was always Sam who had to act like the mature one.

The two eyed each other, half jokingly, for a minute, before the Doctor said, "Right, well, who wants to see the Gardens of Gastaporamus?"

Dean pulled two beers out of the cooler he'd installed after a few trips with the Doctor. He handed one to Sam, then cracked his own open and toasted the Doctor. "Where you lead, I will follow."

Sam and the Doctor both smiled at him, then the Doctor laughed. "Right, then…Geronimo!"

After a few minutes of bumping around, the TARDIS landed with a crash and its usual materializing sound, and the Winchesters walked over to the door. Upon opening it, Sam raised his eyebrows in confusion, and Dean called back over his shoulder, "Uh, Doc…I'm not seeing much of a garden anywhere."

"What?" the Doctor asked, confused, as he hurried over, only to see a deserted wasteland all around the TARDIS. He sighed, and said, "Boys, it looks like we have another case."

The brothers both smiled at the alien. "Fantastic."

* * *

Hope you enjoyed! And, also, I hope those Gilmore Girls fans among you will see the reference (; Jared shoutout!

Anyway, please R&R!

Love you all!


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